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Huntress Page 20
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I peeked at her foot, which she thrust forward for me to examine. Sure enough, she wore two-inch heels that matched the dress. “I bet those would make decent weapons.”
“I thought so, but my swords would be better. Or my bow.”
“Still haven’t talked the RPS into letting you carry them, have you?”
“Apparently, I’m terrifying. They’d feel much safer if I just carried a gun. I think they’re ridiculous.”
I thought they were right, but I’d let her win for the sake of peace between us. “The weapons on your feet look lovely.”
“She really wants me to keep the dress and the shoes, and she says I can get both in white. Or have these bleached. Bleach is cheaper.”
“I’m happy with that dress in whatever color you want it if that pleases you. It’s your dress. I’m not the one who has to wear it.”
“But you’re the one who is supposed to like it.”
I snorted and did my best to match her disgusted expression. “Eva, you could show up in torn jeans for our wedding and I’d like that plenty. I only care you show up for the wedding. The dress is lovely on you, and you could keep it in that color if you like, too.”
“Really?”
“It can be a showcase example of just how little we care for the pomp and circumstance of royal displays and ceremonies.”
Eva frowned, her gaze dipping to her shoes and the hem of her dress. “I should keep the dress and the shoes, then?”
“Keeping the dress makes her happy and spares you from a month’s worth of fittings, dress design, and general torture.”
“Okay. I’m sold. I’ll keep the dress.”
“And only those of us here will know you’re wearing it for the same purpose twice. Honestly, I like that. That dress will become a favorite memory.”
“You have made a successful sales pitch. But why am I wearing a dress? I don’t understand how this happened.”
“I don’t think we’re supposed to question the pregnant queen.”
“You present a very good point.”
I grinned. “Sometimes I do, but it’s rare.”
“Have I somehow agreed to marry a nutter who is also an idiot?”
“It’s entirely possible.”
“Well, at least I get to beat up a bear. That’s a great consolation prize. Let’s get this done before somebody change their mind or these shoes kill me.”
A single form determined my marital status, and it only had one page. Check boxes confirmed the court judge had verified our vital records, and I refused to ask how His Royal Majesty of Montana had gotten hold of the required paperwork. Three additional pages confirmed I gave my wife equal status and that we refused to create a prenuptial agreement to protect my interests.
As though sensing she’d have a battle on her hands to win anything other than the dress and shoes, Mackenzie wasted no time securing our signatures following a brief lecture from the judge about our actions.
The judge seemed annoyed he had to give the lecture to confirm we knew what we were getting ourselves into, but he wasn’t willing to battle with Mackenzie over it.
William’s eyes narrowed with suspicion, and he looked his wife over. “You’re already planning their wedding, aren’t you?”
“Do they look like they want to do it?” Mackenzie lifted her chin. “I’m good at planning.”
“I know you are.”
“They don’t want to, and I do.”
I covered my mouth and struggled to contain my laughter.
“The Your Highness I just married does not have time to plan a wedding. He’ll be in physical therapy, training, and doing the paperwork all you Your Highnesses and Your Majesties seem overly fond of. I have a partial stay of paperwork until the spring, but I’ll be busy training him to not die in the meantime. That’s important. As he very much likes the dress and the shoes, I’ll wear this dress and these shoes, in these colors, to this event. I will do this with minimal protest.”
“See? She’s siding with me.”
William drew in a deep breath and sighed, bowing his head. “No matter what I say, I lose. Have it your way, Mackenzie. Please don’t traumatize Illinois’s future queen. This isn’t an opportunity to start another baby rivalry, either. King Adam and I are concerned the current situation will become ridiculous.”
“And we both know Adam would be happy with even twenty children.”
“When Julia was born, you screamed at me, Mackenzie. I clearly heard you. The words ‘Never the fuck again’ came out of your mouth. Repeatedly.”
“I was stupid for refusing the epidural.”
“Mackenzie. You didn’t even last a year before you went on a rampage and slaughtered my birth control.”
“It’s your fault. I look at you, and then I think we need more babies.”
I gulped and stared at my new wife, hoping she wouldn’t kill me before I lured her to my bedroom.
She smiled at me. “I’m going to try to keep a firm grasp on reality and maintain reasonable expectations. Maybe we should pick a number?”
“I’m not a reasonable person to ask about this, Eva. My family is huge. I only have one brother, but honestly, I’ve lost count of my sisters.”
“Well, if it’s helpful, twenty seems like an unreasonable number of children.”
“I’m inclined to agree with you,” I replied.
“That’s because you’re wise and I’m right. Hey, bear?”
Crap. I’d been so focused on Eva I’d forgotten my great-grandpa had witnessed me marry her. Literally. I double checked the papers still on the king’s desk, and sure enough, his signature was there as a witness.
It amazed me he’d managed to keep quiet the entire time.
“Yes, my little great-granddaughter?”
My life was destined to become very interesting.
“How long do you think we’ll be able to keep this quiet?”
“With Gail and her mouth? The world will know you’re in Kel’s sights within a week. Enjoy any subterfuge you can.”
“But I don’t want to be unemployed.”
“You have nothing to worry about. If you’re punted out of the RPS because of being part of the family, we can find work that’ll keep you busy. I’m sure Kel has a list of jobs you’d be suited for and isn’t make-work.”
I certainly did, and only one of them involved the bedroom I looked forward to thinking of as ours. “You’ll be kept plenty busy,” I promised.
“Good. I don’t do bored well. I start scheming things when I get bored, or I go on a hunt.”
“I’m always going to volunteer the bear if you’re bored.”
“I knew there was a reason I wanted to marry you.”
I shrugged and laughed. “I’ll take what I can get.”
My phone rang, and the sound startled me so much I yelped, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. Flushing, I snatched the device and checked the display, grimacing when my father’s name showed. “I need to take this.”
With the paperwork signed by me, no one needed me, so I stepped into the hall. As expected, Meredith trailed in my wake and stood guard nearby.
I supposed asking her to stick with Eva for two hours had tested her patience a little.
I answered right before the phone went to voice mail. “What’s wrong, Dad?”
“That hyena went to the media, and as expected, she’s spreading a cocktail of lies. I’ve done some preliminary work, including securing the security tape of her entering your bedroom with Donald for her tryst, much to your mother’s dismay. I want your permission to leak it to the media along with an official statement that you’d claimed irreconcilable differences due to you directly witnessing her cheating on you.”
“Do it,” I ordered. “I’ll get a verified statement about the situation from a truth seer and have it released to the media in the morning.”
“Get your lanky ass home, Kel. You’re going to need to be seen in public if you want this to work.”
r /> “All right. I’ll be there by morning. I’m bringing an updated copy of the abdication agreement with me, signed and ready for your confirmation along with the congress’s.”
My father sighed. “Great. That’s going to add fuel to the fire. Can we delay this?”
“No. The agreement includes a clause that upon marrying the woman of my choice, two days before spring, the abdication will be stricken assuming my health issues are resolved to the satisfaction of Montana’s royal physicians.”
“Say what?”
“I’m marrying someone two days before spring, and the promise to do so is written into the agreement that’ll be signed by you, Mother, and the congress. It should take the wind out of Gail’s sails. I’ll authorize the agreement to be leaked to the media so they can have a field day with it.”
“You’re really going to marry that woman.”
“We’ve already picked a wedding date, and we’ve already selected a wedding planner, so yes. I am. The agreement specifically mentions that I will have an unobstructed choice of wife. Dad, it’s not a game to me. She’s not the queen you want, but she’s the queen I need. That’s the end of the story. If you want me to be the king in your wake, you need to accept her or cut me loose. That’s something only you can decide. But this agreement will ease concerns in the congress about the line of succession.”
“But you have no proof she’s your one, Kel.”
“Dad, I don’t care if she’s not the one my talent needs. Bone marrow transfusions will buy me some time if necessary. With Eva’s contribution of talents, we don’t need a male heir. We just need an heir. Her talent is likely strong enough to classify as royal level without any contribution on my part.”
“You’re serious. You’re really willing to accept suffering for the rest of your life for her.”
“Yes, I am. I’ve spoken with His Royal Majesty of Montana about the issue, and he helped draft the amendments to the agreement. I’m expecting you to sign, and I’m expecting the congress to sign. If I die by age fifty, that’s an unfortunate consequence of my choice. But I refuse to marry someone like Gail, who is attempting to coerce her way onto the throne. She does not nor will she ever love me. She’s after a crown, Dad. Why can’t you see this?”
“Oh, I see it. Your mother’s beginning to see it, too. But your mother worries Gail is a better alternative to Eva.”
“I’ve made up my mind, Dad. I won’t change it. I’d like my engagement to Eva to remain a secret for as long as possible so she can enjoy her work in the RPS without interference. As such, I fully intend on discrediting everything else Gail has said and coming up with a suitable answer to the rest.”
“Who will you use for the verification?”
“His Royal Majesty of Montana. If he’s verifying the truth, there’ll be no doubts. When you release the security footage, ensure both her and Donald emerge with their modesty intact, such that it is.”
“I shouldn’t give them that much. To think they’d do that in your bedroom.”
“I told you, Dad. I told you there were circumstances ensuring I’d never entertain Gail as a wife ever again. I was serious.”
“I see that now.” My father sighed. “This is a nightmare.”
“For Gail, yes. For me, no. While the health clause will still be within the contract, I will make a public statement that I’m working towards being able to resume my full duties within the next, say, three months. That’ll give me time to work with my new RPS detail and be able to adapt to heightened security.”
“I can work with a three-month window. What about Grégoire?”
“What about him? I’m going to evaluate his workload starting tomorrow, shift as much off him as possible, and return him to a supporting role. I won’t be able to pick up much of the work personally, but at least I can better delegate so he won’t smother as much. Montana’s concerned, and that’s my top priority. Once I’ve delegated the workload off him, send him to North Dakota for a while.”
“I see you’ve been notified about his relationship with Abby.”
“Dad, he’s an Averett man. If he settles down with Abby, she’ll find no better partner. A wolverine will be able to protect her, too. Until King Adam and Queen Veronica have a child of age, she’s the next in line for the throne. She’ll need someone like Grégoire supporting her.”
“But Grégoire will be a miserable king.”
“No. I disagree. He’ll be a miserable king of Illinois. He works best in a supporting role. Abby would be the queen. He would be the husband supporting his wife in every capacity possible. When you put him in a supporting role, he shines. He can learn to be her consort, but he may never learn to be Illinois’s king. Those are two different things. With luck, Abby will never have to worry about coming near a throne. Suggest he go to North Dakota for some time away from Illinois. With a little work and some help, I can manage without him. He’s earned the break.”
My father heaved a sigh. “Your mother isn’t going to handle this well, Kel. She’s going to handle this so not well. There will be screaming. She’s going to have a meltdown. She’s already well on her way to having a meltdown. She didn’t believe Gail had cheated on you until she heard about the surveillance videos. Also, I might leak your request for them to take their debauchery to another bedroom so you could burn your sheets. That clip shows nothing, but both of their voices can be heard, and we can match the videos with them going to your bedroom and leaving their clothes all over your floor.”
I’d be playing with fire, and inevitably, I’d get burned authorizing it, but I had little choice.
Gail would do her best to sabotage me. “Do it, but you’re taking responsibility for the leak. I’m going to feign ignorance over the leak if asked.”
“Very well. When will you be able to return to the castle?”
I smirked at the easy, obvious way to taunt my father. “I’ll let you know when we’re on route. I’ll get the bear to fly us in to save some time.”
My father groaned. “Please don’t let him crash the plane. The last thing I need is for you to be involved in a plane crash today, Kel. Please.”
“Despite appearances, the bear is a licensed pilot and keeps his plane in good condition, Dad.”
“I know, but I worry.”
“Him crashing the plane is the least of our concerns right now. I’ll call you with an ETA. Expect a few hours. I have some things I have to take care of before I can leave.”
Exhaustion hit me at the same time I relayed my father’s warning about Gail going to the media. His Royal Majesty of Montana pinched the bridge of his nose. “I was hoping for at least a day before this happened. Just one day.”
“Gail isn’t very patient.”
“So it seems. Alfred? Get the plane ready. I’ll go to Illinois to handle this issue personally. Arrange a pilot to return Mr. Averett’s plane to wherever he stores it. I’ll take them with me. We’ll plan to leave so it appears I flew to the airstrip nearest to Mr. Averett’s residence before flying us all to Chicago. That’ll give us a few hours to make a game plan and deal with this issue.”
Meredith cleared her throat. “With all due respect, Your Majesty, Prince Kelvin needs some rest. He’s not going to be able to handle pulling an all-nighter plus a potential press conference in the morning.”
His Royal Majesty of Montana looked me over with narrowed eyes before turning to his wife’s security detail. “Geoff?”
“When you ask things of me, I become worried.”
“Contact Dr. Hampford, get the appropriate dosage, and ensure His Royal Highness of Illinois enjoys a nice nap until we reach Chicago. I don’t want to be murdered by one of my own physicians for putting her patient at risk.”
Eva snickered, linked her arm with mine, and held me in place. “Grab the other arm, Meredith. He’s slippery, and he’ll try to run.”
“You don’t have to sedate me,” I protested.
“We don’t have to, but we’re going to. We’ll h
ave your wife keep an eye on you, but I know your type.” William closed the distance between us and dropped his hand on my shoulder. “You’ll do what I do, which involves running yourself into the ground, and you’re not in a good place to do that right now. So, a drug-aided nap is our best option. Just go along with it. Some sleep will do you a world of good, and Dr. Hampford can meet us in Chicago and make sure you’re properly on the mend. This has the added benefit of giving you an out from any press conferences. I’ll handle it on your behalf, and I’ve already heard your side of the story, which I can verify as the truth. To add insult to injury, I’ll call in another truth seer to verify that I’m telling the truth. This Gail woman won’t have a leg to stand on when I’m done, and if she wants to pull any stunts, she’s going to have to somehow convince you to forgive her. I wish her the best of luck with that by the time I’m finished. For the truth seer, I’ll pick a New Yorker, because New Yorkers love nothing more than trying to catch me in a lie.”
With no other choice, I surrendered with a weary shrug. “If you really think it’s necessary.”
“It’s necessary.” Eva gave my arm a squeeze. “You’ve been on the run all day, and you’ll stress over the preparations. Let us take care of everything, then you’ll only have to worry about the mandatory stuff in the morning. It’ll be all right. I’ll make sure that piece of shit doesn’t have a chance of sinking her claws into you.”
“All right. I’m going along with this, but I’m doing so under protest.”
William grinned at me. “Welcome to being a royal. Alfred and Geoff do the same thing to me for the same reasons. You’ll get used to it.”
“Like hell I’ll get used to it!”
Eva laughed. “Famous last words, Your Highness.”
“I promise you I have zero intention of getting used to being sedated to make the RPS feel better, Your Highness.”
She tugged on my arm. “No, but you’ll accept it because it’ll make me feel better.”